Ho Ho Ho! Merry JL Day!

There may still be over five weeks until Christmas, but that doesn’t matter when there’s stuff to sell. Lest we forget, John Lewis and Partners’ eagerly-awaited Christmas advert was by no means the first from a major retailer either.

With years of classic ads behind them, including a hare waking up a hibernating bear, a penguin called Monty, trampolining wildlife and an old bloke on the moon, 2018’s outing was always going to have a hard time matching it’s predecessors. It even had to contend with the re-branding Bohemian Rhapsody-school-play advert from just a few weeks ago, which was widely applauded.

So, what did we get? Elton John. In reverse. Featuring the Prima Donna’s life in “Your Song” moments, from him sitting at his piano in the present day, through his assorted outrageous looks, and back to him receiving the same piano as a child.

Wow. Elt’s folks were minted then. A piano? I used to think getting a 30 pack of felt tip pens and a bar of chocolate was pretty good. Or are we meant to buy an Elton?

Sorry, but I’m confused. What am I meant to take from this?

The tag line is “Some gifts are more than just a gift”. Ah, OK – maybe your little ‘un is a future star who battles drug addiction, argues with staff at airports and has a hair transplant – quick, buy them something expensive so they’ll look back on it fondly in a major retailer’s advertising campaign one day.

Still, the CGI of different-era Eltons is impressive - and of course it’s coincidence that the Piano Man has tour tickets on sale, and a biopic coming out next year.

Maybe the ad should have ended with “A piano is for life, not just for Christmas”.

Much better is the other John Lewis advert. This one is a guy of that name who lives in Virginia, and has the twitter handle @johnlewis. Despite making it abundantly clear that he is “not a retail store” he still receives more than 100 tweets a day with queries aimed at the shopping emporium.

Quietly becoming a legend with his witty replies to their customers, Twitter have made him his own Christmas advert, featuring the man himself and a suitably ballad-styled version of “In The Bleak Midwinter”.

Catch it if you can.

It might take your mind of seeing Elton every time you turn your TV on.